Jesus Fucking Christ

Written by Connie Belcher ///

You’re a priest, the world has just gone to hell and you need to make things right, obviously with lots of fire power. What do you do? Grab your Baby Jesus butt plug. For some reason, the marriage of anal sex and The Lord really get folks off. Divine Interventions knew this and garnered instant fame with the release of a Baby Jesus butt plug. Their line of holy figure toys include: Diving Nun, Virgin Mary, Moses, The Devil, The Grim Reaper, Judas, Buddha’s Delight and the Jackhammer Jesus. Each creatively resembles its titled personality in a unique form.

All these products are all available in marbled white, blue, red, gold, silver black, purple; rag red, snow white, asphyxiation blue and glow in the dark purple. Marbled means the dildo shimmers and shines with metallic luster. Pure silicone is the preferred material used by these dildo makers. It is resilient, retains body heat and easy to clean. Care for your products from Divine Interventions can be as simple as sticking it into the dishwasher, but the purveyors suggest that you sterilize it in boiling water for three minutes or wash it with antibacterial soap to keep it germ-free. The creators also advise that you never use silicone based lubricants on your silicone products. Doing so may result as an ugly visit from the wicked witch of the west. If you or someone you know is looking for savior visit www.divine-intervention.com. Hell, go out and save your neighbor with some holy humping.